We usually hate that we can't contain how we feel about someone, if you like someone it's just as simple as that. You try to be mad at them and you might be able to keep that compare on the outside but on the inside you just can't stay mad at them and you just want attention from them. Who doesn't want attention and that feeling of being wanted? The worst part is when you are being lead on by someone that you like solely because they know you do. They keep you far enough away so you don't get too attached but keep you close enough so you don't stray. I like to call these people, assholes, because it just doesn't make any sense. I'm no Kylie Jenner so it isn't like I have a list of men waiting for me but I just don't see why anyone would enjoy this. If you aren't genuinely into someone than there is about 3000 ways to let someone down the right way so both parties aren't hurt or it's awkward to keep hanging out with them.
It's the worst when the person you like is someone you are friends with or see a good amount because you never want to admit to yourself, or anyone else, what your feeling. You don't want to lose them as a friend so you put up with being lead on because not having them in your life just seems s strange. Just when you think those feelings are going away or it was all in your head they text you or like a photo on your Instagram like they knew you were thinking about. They had to throw that fishing rod out hoping to reel you back in just a little bit. It's always something so subtle too, that like on Instagram could have been the tragic accidental "like" hit and that text they sent could have one reply than you don't hear back and all these thoughts come rushing through your head. Being lead on is just another reason we stay awake at night watching He's Just Not That Into You and thinking "What's wrong with me?" And people wonder why women and gay men are considered crazy, WE OVERTHINK THINGS. Everyone knows this too, it's just another game to some people and I can't even finish a game of Monopoly so I'm not sure why they think I'm here to play this game. Give me back my sanity and be straightforward to me! I can't speak for everyone but I just think the easiest way to end this back and forth of being lead on is to just be honest with that person. Don't be afraid to mention that you aren't sure where you stand and ask them what they think about you two taking it to the next level.
Honestly, prepare for the worst because we all know life isn't perfect but it's better if you find out sooner rather than later....trust me. Make both your lives easier and since they are being that asshole I mentioned earlier and just enjoying the ride than don't hesitate to reconsider how much time you are spending with this person after you get your answer. You never know, you just might get that answer you want to hear and I truly hope that for all of you. I'll be bitter but that doesn't mean I can't be happy for you, we are all a little bitter. So go out there, take the leash off and hand it back. Just etch out the number on your collar so they can't call you back.
Here to say it,
postgradgay
Foreigner's God // Hozier
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